What's Good?
Equals- First Among (Best of)- "Oh no, we got to rock on to Electric Avenue, and then we'll take it higher...Out in the streets"- you remember the early 80's, when MTV had the 8-song rotation cuz that's about all the vids they could play. Turns out Eddy Grant had him a serious past, and this document is part of it, an absolutely terrific slab of R&B, psych pop, and maybe just a touch of reggae beat to keep the boys back home thinking it's real. Outstanding for the late-night slowdown, the Sunday morning groove in, or the big smoke roll along.

Sharks' Penalty Killing Adjustments- any fool could have told Ron Wilson that the Sharks were not applying enough pressure in the neutral zone and on the blue line in Game 1, and the result was four power play goals for the Predators and a loss that could have been avoided with a simple tactical adjustment. OK, so they watched films and haven't allowed a power play goal since, but the tardiness burns my eye. Look for the Predators to dump and chase in Game 4, and let's see how the Sharks adjust. Slow-reacting Canuck fucks.

Moylan's Moylander Double IPA (8.5% ABV, 22 oz.)-- the most orgasmic beer I have had in my newest faze as balding, ponytailed, middle-aged beer snob was not this one, but the regular Moylan's IPA I had at Barclay's when the family "stumbled there" a month back for lunch, pretending we were just on a walk and never intending to find a cheap excuse to have a few before noon. Well, last weekend Nicole and I went to Chez Panisse to celebrate her birthday, and for a nitecap, I picked up this Big Daddy to wash the taste of California greens out of my mouth, and honey, can you say Hopsickle? Double your pleasure, double your load. Every belch is like a Nebraska farmhand farting in your mouth while he lies upside down chewing down some grain. One bottle is the perfect way to wet your appetite for several more. Can you say hop parade, party boy?

The Teaching Company- I get more sustained pleasure out of my commute than almost any other event of the day, and while that might beg certain questions about the quality of my life, let's just say I side with the Epicureans who argued that the pleasures of the mind are the highest, the grandest, and the longest lasting. Plus, I haven't figured out a way to sneak in an 8-ball and several Bolivian dancegirls to my post-Sharks parties. Anyway, I've been pimping these guys for years, so what's one more time- www.teachco.com, or come over with some Moylan's and I'll loan you my 96 lectures on the early Christ. The man was an apocalyptic hoot.

Gift Certificates to Fancy Boutiques for Your Significant Other's Birthday- ya know, I'm really tired of that look. The one she barely tries to hide when you go out on a limb and try to get her something from the heart and she doesn't even give you an A for effort and just grimaces and shakes her head and asks if you've kept the receipt and looks at you like if you loved her you'd know exactly what she wants and since you didn't get her exactly what she wants, well I'll stop there. I went all expensive gift certificates this year, and I was husband-king. Throw in a big bouquet of flowers and I just might have scored myself two more trips to Barclay's next week. It's all about compromise, sisters. Let the old man show you a strong negotiating technique. And yes, shoes were involved. Expensive shoes.

The US Passport Office- thank you for your hiring fat sloths with bad tempers who hate people, and thank you for making me feel proud of America once again. Guys, your postal workers are always at your service.