Well, that cold April rain falling on this dismal morning can only mean one thing- the start of the most exciting two months (one if you're a Sharks fan) in sports- the NHL playoffs. Because alcoholic aging punkers tend more toward baseball (longer game times mean more justifiable drinking times, plus all those "it's OK" day drinking benders with the 1:00 weekend starts), let me guide you through the first round of this year's playoff matchups.
EASTERN CONFERENCE
(1) Washington Capitals vs. (8) New York Rangers- the Rangers are everybody's consensus pick for biggest dog in the post-season, so even the Caps can't choke to them. Caps in 5.
(2) Philadelpia Flyers vs. (7) Buffalo Sabres- You'd have to love the Flyers except for one thing- Chris Pronger, the most intimidating and successful defenseman over the past decade, is out for at least the first two games. Sabres in 6.
(3) Boston Bruins vs. (6) Montreal Canadiens- the hate in this rivalry makes every game a must-watch and more emotion favors the underdog, but I'm still sayin' Boston has too much all over. Bruins in 6.
(4) Pittsburgh Penguins vs. (5) Tampa Bay Lightning- Malkin and Crosby are still out, but somehow they'll figure out a way to make it happen. Pens in 7.
WESTERN CONFERENCE
(1) Vancouver Canucks vs. (8) Chicago Blackhawks- last year's Stanley Cup winners back in on the last day and get this year's regular season class act for their trouble. All signs point to the Canucks marching through the playoffs, but they rarely beat the Hawks and they have a history of Shark-like gagging. Hawks in 7.
(2) San Jose Sharks vs. (7) Los Angeles Kings- the first round is always a struggle for the men in teel, and this year should be no different. The loss of Kopitar, though, and the Kings' general lack of firepower should set Sharks' fans' misery back a few weeks. Sharks in 6.
(3) Detroit Red Wings vs. (6) Phoenix Coyotes- the Coyotes match up well against the aging gentlemen from Hockey Town, but somehow those red and white jerseys find a way. Wings in 7.
(4) Anaheim Ducks vs. (5) Nashville Predators- the Ducks have the best line in hockey with Perry./Getzlaf/Ryan, and that alone will be too much for the Predators, who have never won a post-season series and want to keep that streak alive. Ducks in 7.
See you in a couple of weeks for Round 2, when my 3/8 prediction stats will have my credibility drowning in a puddle of beer, sweat and tears.
3 comments:
The output is amazing. Take it from a non producer. Your work ethic is something to be marveled.
Can we expect an NBA preview? You know how much I think of the both leagues' regular season/post-season format. Finally we have arrived at a point when its time to watch pro hockey and hoops...except as far as hoops go, I don't really care unless there is a local team involved.
But by all means, Go Sharks!
well, it's surely a testament to my empty life.
In other news, the Sharks dominate the first period, fall asleep for thirty minutes and pull it out in OT with last year's hero Pavelski driving it top shelf. I'm fucking exhausted and it's game fucking one.
The NHL playoffs are fucking beautiful, especially when you fucking win.
Signed,
King Understatement Asshole
if the Sharks are different this year, this might be part of the reason-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpEV3Qpajr4
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